So in love.

I have not blogged because I did not feel the need to post once again how tired I am. Yesterday was borderline depression. I had NO stamina to do anything! And yet I found myself running around all day for specific social events. BY the end of the day I was happy to drop off my lil girl at her Ommie and Papa's house for the night and tuck my lil guy into bed. It was soooooooooo quiet. Brandon drew me a bath by candlelight whereupon I layed out for 45 min, not reading or anything, just being. When I got out, Brandon had cleaned the entire bedroom and bought me some flowers he arranged in a vase (he has picked up some floral skills from the years of being married to me-so much so I thought he bought them arranged that way)and wrote me the most beautiful love note starting with this heart-throb of a line "You are like this vase of flowers, full and vibrant. You catch my eye every time you walk into the same room as I." It was the perfect touch. Brandon and I came to be with one another through such little love notes.

When I was 17, he and I dated for about 3 months before I had concluded that "he was NOT the one for me." However in those short three months, he had concluded otherwise. When I left for college an hour drive away, we continued our friendship through written word in the form of snail mail. Over the course of 7 months, his letters turned more serious as he confessed his love for me, and his prayer that my heart would turn towards him in the same way. Furious, I stopped talking to him altogether for almost 2 weeks-how dare he ruin our friendship like that! After those weeks, I began praying that the Lord would change my heart or change his-hoping that God would change his. And I basically told him to move on, or we couldn't be friends. It was not until he had a date set up with a girl he met at the Delta Blood Bank that I suddenly felt jealous (I later learned that he made this date up.) I should also mention that at that time, I had been carrying his love note in my wallet for close to a month now, reading it almost daily. It was this letter that changed my heart. Brandon may seem like a tough guy, but he is very sensitive and poetic. (Don't tell him I told you so.) Over his Birthday weekend, I literally fell in love with him as God painted THE most romantic night in the course of history, and confessed to him my love in return. We dated long distance for a year and a half, before we were engaged for another 8 months. We had a date once weekly where we would meet in Tracy (the half way point) and take turns visiting each other on weekends. We talked on the phone as any long distance couple might, but mostly, it was our letters that poured into the depth of our relationship until the day of our marriage.

Since then, it is fair to say he and I have been through much. And the 7 year itch made itself known this past year. But here we are, pushing past yet another trial, bonded together deeper than before. For the first time in a long while I find myself leaning on him for support that I cannot muster inside myself. I find myself tingling with insecurity and doubts, where he is there to catch me with words of affirmation. He is my husband, he is my best friend, he is the father of my beloved children, he leads me spiritually, he teaches me lessons in life through the building of our testimony. I love you Brandon!