...in all seriousness I am not claiming prophetic abilities, but I will confess to some crazy vivid dreams that sometimes contain messages. Recently I have been recounting a few of them and it seems as though some of these dreams have come to pass. I have always believed that my dreams were God sent, but to be honest my interpreting skills are not quite up to par. For example, starting at the age of around 12 I had had this recurring dream where I was playing with a beautiful little girl. In my dream she was my first born, and I had thought that life was grand and that I would not have any other children naturally, but would rather adopt a son so that I would have a boy and a girl. At the end of the dream I heard a voice while my dream would simultaneously blacken, the voice stated matter of factly that I would have two girls and that the younger would save the older. And I would awaken at the end every time. Naturally I grew up believing a need to have two children so when I found out I was pregnant for the first time I was already convinced that it would be a girl. Hannah came along. When I was pregnant for the second time you can imagine my surprise when I discovered that we were having a boy. This did not correlate with my dreams. And so I thought I must not be prophetic after all.
Several years ago, also prior to childbearing, I had another dream after buying groceries for a homeless boy claiming need for his family. In the dream I was sitting on a rock watching 8 children play in a small park. After the dream I felt it pressed upon me that God was going to give me eight children to raise for his glory. As the years went by I had forgotten this dream and in no way do I have the desire to give birth to 8 children. Therefore, again, these dreams of mine must not be prophetic...
...yet, in reflecting over these dreams again, I am reminded of a time in my life where a woman randomly asked if she could pray for me almost 6 years ago today. In her prayer she prophesied that I "would be a mother to many, as Sarai became Sarah and was mother of a great nation." But, she emphasized, these children to whom I would mother "would not be of my seed."
Naturally, I interpreted this prophesy as my gift for teaching, as I in fact do mother many students every year. Later as my spiritual growth matured, I further interpreted this prophesy to include the youth that I have helped mentor in church groups over the years as I do believe many of them would testify to my "motherly nature and discipline tone." It wasn't until this week that all three of the above mentioned prophesies began to interpret differently, uniquely...specifically....
In the year 2006, Brandon and I prayed about becoming foster parents. This passion and desire strengthened all the more once returning from our mission trip to India and I began to volunteer weekly at a local homeless shelter, hosting bible study for the children while their mother's attended parenting classes. Many of the children I watched during this time, were former foster kids, helping to soften my heart to idea of children being surrendered back to their families and confirming my heart's decision while simultaneously eroding the fear of the unknown. After going through the training courses, we signed up to foster kids between the ages of 3-7. When we received a call for our first placement, we were elated! The girls was 5, only one catch, she had a sister age 8.
If we had been called about an 8 year old, I can't say that we would have turned her away, but I can't say whether or not we would have said yes either. Not wanting to break up a sibling pair, we agreed to take in both girls. Upon meeting my eldest foster daughter I made a remark about my first observation: "You are kinda big for an 8 year old," whereupon she frankly replied "Um, I'm nine going on ten." Well, that explains that doesn't it. I can say that we would have probably said no to the placement of a ten year old.
At first, Mariah was not an easy foster child as she had all the attitude in the world, questioned everything I said, lied, stole on occasion and pushed just about every boundary we set in place. But after living with us for three months, I will NEVER forget the moment when she looked at me and timidly asked "Shelley, would it be okay if I called you mom?" My heart melted and tears pushed at my lids; wouldn't you know, to this day, over two years after my dear girls were reunited with their birth mom, she still calls me mom whenever we talk.
In thinking back to my first dream, I believe Desiree and Mariah are my interpretation. Desiree, the youngest, saved Mariah, the oldest. For again, I don't think we would have taken Mariah in if it had not been for Desiree. And although I KNOW God is not finished working in their lives, I can say that both girls have established a belief in the Lord through being in our home, and that both girls view of life has been significantly altered from our devotion to them.
Prophecy number two's interpretation came to me this past week when my house seemed flooded with children.
While on summer vacation, I have been watching my friend Lisa's baby. I met Lisa when she was 3 years old. She was my first babysitting job-yes, I am babysitting my second generation with this one! I discovered that she was pregnant right around the time that I discovered I was pregnant with Zechary. Our sons are exactly one week apart. When Lisa's baby's dad went to jail, my heart sympathized for her, as my heart has always broken for her in times of trouble in her life. I again, flet responsibility to protect her, and was with her the day she gave birth to her son Raphael; I was with her the day my water broke. I was the first one she called when the baby's father returned to jail- leaving her alone and struggling to make it as a single mother of an infant. So naturally when she called me for help to watch little Raphael, I was compelled to say yes.
These past two weeks, I have also had Katie, my sister in law age 11 and my nephew Joey age 12 staying in my home. Katie was adopted by my mother in law several years ago and has a very difficult home life. After my father in law moved in with us, we decided to keep Katie 2-3 weeks a year. This year, my nephew also came along for a visit something we have been trying to coordinate for years now. As if my walls weren't alredy buldging at their seems, Mariah, Desiree and their baby sister Destiny came along for a week's stay. (Since reuniting with their birth mom, we have kept contact with them and maintain a positive relationship with them and their mom. We try to take them for a weekend every month to give their mom some support and during this past school year we were picking them up two to three times a week to keep up on their school work and grades.) Overall, that made eight kids, when including my two precious little ones.
In stepping back to observe the happenings of this summer, I do believe that my dreams were God inspired and each prophesy has been fulfilled. It wasn't until I became intent to listen to Him, allowed him to direct His will/path in my life and waited for His timing that I was blesed with the interpretation. I have been given a glimpse of the prophesy that dear Ms. Ernie prayed over me all those years ago in a time of great turmoil. Whenever things get rocky and/or I feel as though I am not making a difference in this world, I get to think on these precious ones and know that I am impacting the world for God's kingdom, not only on a weekly basis through work and church-although this does holds great significance and I believe is part of the prophesy given to her! But I am blessed with an oppertunity to that "mother" on a very intense, very intimate, and very personal level with offspring that are not "of my seed." It is my prayer and hope that I am allowed to continue to be part of the lives of these very precious children for their entire life span.
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